To Love You
by Christiangrrl13
Summary: When Raven sat down to meditate, she never expected to hear Him speak to her. Now, after she's recovered what was once only a dream to her, will she finally feel included and loved?
1. A Voice in My Ear

Chapter One: A Voice In My Ear

Raven sat in her room, staring blankly at a dark book she had been reading. She had been here for what the alarm clock told her had been an hour. She wasn't especially happy with herself, and she wasn't reading, though the book had been in front of her for nearly an hour. She was deep in thought.

She had always been a Christian at heart, but now, as she thought back to the tragedy of her life, she was separated. Did her friends really love her? And how could she be loved by Him if she didn't even love herself?

For a long time now, Raven had been feeling that she was completely alone in this cold, unfeeling world. Her friends didn't get it. They were always happy. None of them seemed to know what it felt like to live her life. No one ever showed any compassion for her. She was the ignored one, the one for whom no one cared.

Raven put the book on her packed bookshelf, then looked around. Why was she so different? She was like a streak of black placed unconcernedly on a white drawing pallet. She always had been. She supposed that she always would be. But why did she have to stick out so much? Did she really have a reason for being?

Raven suddenly realized a tear streaking down her cheek. Angry with herself for allowing any emotion to break through, she brushed it away fiercely. _No, s_he thought, each word penetrating her mind like a nail through wood,_ I will not cry! I have practiced far too long for my emotions to cut loose now!_

_I just need to meditate,_ she thought to herself. She crossed her legs, and then began to levitate, chanting all too-familiar words. But even this was not enough to satisfy her undeniable urge to be cared for. _Just concentrate, _said her inner self, and she did. For a long time, her mind was blank. She felt, thought, and heard nothing. Then, a voice called to her.

"Raven," it said, deep and calm, "Where have you gone? Don't you know I've always been here?"

"Who's there?" she called out, opening her eyes.

"It's me, daughter, and I want you to come back to me."

Raven gasped. She didn't know that the Lord could be heard when He was speaking. Sure, she read the Bible, but she thought that God didn't speak to mortals anymore.

"I'm here, Lord." She called

"Raven, you are not alone. I have told you that I will not forsake you. You need not fear that."

"I know." She replied. She knew the verse well.

"Why do you think you're alone? Don't you know that your friends love you? Are they not your true friends?" He asked.

"I…always feel separate from them, no matter how they try to change that."

"Raven, it is because you have not learned to love. My Son said that the world will tell His people from the world by their love. You must share yourself with them, allow them to know you for who you are."

"It's hard. My emotions trigger my powers. If I let myself open up to them, my friends could be in grave danger. I don't ever want to cause them danger." Raven's voice quivered. Talking to the One who knows you better than you do isn't easy.

"Raven, do you not think that more danger can come when you do not have intimate enough a relationship with your friends that you don't share your heart? I have not forsaken you before, and you may cling to me when the road becomes narrow."

Raven was not afraid of her Lord, but she was nervous. She already knew that He knew her every thought, so she didn't understand why she hesitated._ Go on, _she thought;_ just ask the stupid question while you can!_

"Lord, I have a question." Raven took a deep breath. "Why did you give me such horrible dark powers and such an awful life?"

For a moment, there was silence. Then her reply came.

"Raven, if you had not your powers, you would not have your friends. If you didn't have an awful past, you wouldn't have your powers at all. You are a part of my plan, Raven. There is nothing wrong with you in my sights."

Raven smiled "You're right. I may not have a God who saves me from heartache and misery, but I have a God who loves me enough to be there for me when trouble comes and to give me a life beside Him in eternity."

Now she understood. God had a plan, and she was a part of it. Whatever He had in store for her, she was ready and willing.

"Thank You." She said.

"Raven, you need only remember that I'm always here." He said.

After this, Raven felt Him leave. But she also knew that He had not truly left her, that she was not alone.

"I'm not alone." She whispered to herself, feeling reassured. She stood, turning toward the door. She had some sharing to do. She knew that her friends would be there for her, too. She would be all right in the end. But before she left, she stopped. Turning to the bookshelf, she picked up the most-used book there was. It was her Bible.


	2. What You've Never Seen

Chapter Two: What You've Never Seen

Raven entered the common room of Titans Tower. She wasn't sure what she was going to say, but she knew what she needed them to know. Putting the Bible under her arm, she walked over to where Beast Boy and Cyborg sat playing on the Gamestation. Standing in front of the television, she knew she had everyone's full attention.

"Yo, Raven, could this wait? I'm about to kick Beast Boy's butt." said a clearly aggravated Cyborg.

"No," she replied simply, "We need to talk. All of you need to know, and I can no longer conceal the truth from you." When they saw her saddened eyes, they knew that something big had gone down.

"Raven, what's wrong?" asked an ever-concerned Robin. _All right, Raven, you have their attention now. Run with it! _The dark teen sighed, and then sat in her all too-familiar mediation position in front of the irregularly-shaped couch.

"Please sit down," she said, holding her Bible on her lap. As the others did so, she looked over their faces. Starfire's emerald eyes filled with worry, Robin staring at her intently, and the two gaming fanatics looking at her with both surprise and concern. Raven wasn't one to draw any extra attention to herself unless there was great need.

"Friend, what troubles you?" asked the ever-confused alien girl. Raven's indigo eyes met her companion's green ones.

"All right, then I'll begin. The first thing you should know is that I am a Christian," she said, holding her Bible up gently before them. They all showed mild surprise, and Starfire was confused again, but not one said a word. Raven looked down at her hands. "I trust Jesus with my life, and have spoken to God only just now. It is because of Him that I stand before you now.

"I have been feeling unloved of late, and most of all have felt set apart from everyone due to… the circumstances of my past. But He has said that I need not feel that way, and I realize that you've all been at my back the whole time. I apologize to you, because I always pull away from you. It's my fault, all of it.

"Next, you should all know that I love each one of you profoundly. I know I don't show it, and I know I don't deserve such wonderful friends as I have been blessed with because of the way I abuse this wonderful fact. Please know that it has nothing to do with any of you or anything you've done.

"Lastly, you need to know that who I am doesn't like who I've been. I know that I have a horrible past, and I know that because of this, I tend to pull away or be a jerk. I don't mean to hurt you when I do, and I'm inwardly crying when I think of you and all you've done for me and how I've taken you all for granted. I promise to try my hand at changing into who I want to be. I know my powers don't let me share my emotions, but that is no excuse for not sharing myself."

When Raven was finished, she looked up. All of her friends had softened during her speech, and none of them knew what to say. Then, Sarfire broke the silence.

"Oh, Raven!" she cried, throwing her arms gently around the gothic girl before her, "Of course you do not need to be sorry! We know that you have had a most displeasing life and are a changed person as the result!"

"Yeah, Raven, you should know that we don't hate you," said Beast Boy, who now stood and crossed the floor to join the two girls.

"We don't care how you are; we're always going to be there for you." Robin had now stood, also, and was almost immediately followed by Cyborg.

"Thank you…my friends," said a slightly baffled Raven. Who had such good friends as these, to forgive her so easily for so horrible sins? For a while the Titans sat in their group embrace, then broke apart.

"Please," began a disgruntled Starfire, "What is a 'Christian'?" She looked to the others for an explanation.

"It means 'follower of Christ'," Robin answered her, but it was apparent that she needed more. "Christ Jesus was a man a long time ago. He was the son of God, Creator of all the Earth and everything else in existence. He came to die on the Cross for our sins, and so we have eternal life in eternity; the life we earn for ourselves in the time after we've died by our deeds in this life."

Starfire looked amazed. She'd never heard such a story before. Did this mean that she should also be a follower of Christ Jesus? Dumbfounded by the information, she looked to the Bible still in Raven's possession.

"Raven, is this man of which you speak so highly written of in your book?" she asked.

"Yes. In fact, there are many different versions of his story and his teachings all put together in the New Testament," she answered, slightly confused as to where this was going.

"Will you then be as kind as to teach me of this Jesus? I truly wish to hear."

Raven was delighted. Another soul was going to be turned to the Lord because of her! "Of course, Starfire! In fact, you may borrow my Bible until we can buy one for you."

The alien girl was, no doubt, pleased.


	3. The Bookstore

**To my reveiwers:**

**outtahere101- thank you. if you really like this, stay with me; i plan on being a very christian writer from here on out**

**titanfan- if you don't know this story, it's okay. this is just what i believe in, and no, no offense was taken. if you have any questions, here i am**

**God bless, guys!**

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Chapter Three: The Bookstore

Raven and Starfire sat at a small table in a very pink room. Raven held the Bible in her hand, and the alien princess listened intensively to every word that left her mouth. Raven had promised her that after they read Matthew (and maybe John) they would go to the Christian bookstore down the street. The others, hearing of their pre-scheduled trip, were eager to join them.

"…During the meal Jesus took some bread in his hands. He blessed the bread and broke it. Then he gave it to his disciples and said, 'Take this bread and eat it. This is my body.'

"Jesus picked up a cup of wine and gave thanks to God. He said "take this and drink it. This is my blood, and with it God makes his agreement with you. It will be poured out, so that many people will have their sins forgiven. From now on I am not going to drink any wine until I drink new wine with you in my Father's kingdom.'" Then Raven looked up. "See? He knew what he was there for, and just how he would die and even what his death would mean. This is why when you go to church (on given days) they give you a piece of bread and dip it in wine; whenever you consume the mixture, you are re-confirming the covenant Jesus made to us."

"I understand now, friend," Starfire replied, her voice quiet. She spoke as if she did not want to lesson the effects of the powerful information her mind was digesting.

The pale girl smiled. "I think you've earned a trip to the bookstore. I'll treat you to any one item you find (other than your promised Bible) you'd like." She stood, making for the door. "I'll get the others moving. You get ready."

She exited through the door, then moved toward the common room. The door opened , and she saw Cyborg and Beast Boy standing at the kitchen counter arguing about what choice would be wisest for breakfast. Hearing the door open, they turned to see Raven.

"We're ready when you are. Where's Robin?" Raven looked around the room, but the boy was no where to be seen.

"Oh, he just went to find his money. Says he's gonna get a CD from a band he likes.

Raven nodded, looking at the clock. She and Starfire had been at their studies for almost three hours.

"I'll go get him." She began out the door and through the well-known hallways. Seeing his door, she knocked.

"Yeah?"

"We're getting ready to leave. Are you ready?" she asked.

"Sure thing, Raven." The door opened to reveal Robin, who looked exactly the same as he always did. In his hand was a wallet.

Together they walked in silence toward the stairs, then down to the front door. The others had, by this time, gathered there, so they only needed to pile into the T-car. They were all in a good mood, especially Starfire. As she told Robin and Beast Boy what she had learned, Raven stared out the window. _Well, Raven, you've done well for today. You've been more or less open and kind towards everyone, and Star thinks the world of you now._

"There," she said, pointing at a small building on the side of the road. They parked, then made their way inside.

"The Bibles are kept on a shelf in the back, Star. I'll come with you since some versions are better than others." The two girls headed that way, smiling kindly at the man at the register.

After a few minutes of looking, star found a Bible she liked. It looked almost precisely alike to Raven's with the exception that this one was new and had on it a purple cover. With their treasure in hand, they went to the CDs to find Robin looking at a Newsboys CD.

"That's a cool group," Raven said, making Robin turn. He was mildly surprised; he had thought she only listened to dark music.

"You like them?" he asked.

"Sure. I especially like 'He Reigns'." She said, smiling and looking over his shoulder.

They found Beast Boy staring at a stuffed Larry the Cucumber (from Veggie Tales), then saw Cyborg looking at books. Choosing the Purpose Driven Life, he followed his friends.

The clerk seemed mildly amazed that the Teen Titans were in the store, but he recognized Raven. He quickly ran their belongings across the scanner. In all they had one book for Cyborg, one CD for Robin, one stuffed Larry for Beast Boy, Starfire's Bible, and two shining- golden crucifixes. One belonged to Raven; she had gotten the other one for Starfire.

After paying the man, they piled into the car once more, then set off for home. All were content, and every loved listening to Robin's CD. Starfire could even be seen grinning when 'He Reigns' began playing.


	4. Raven's Dilemma

Chapter Four: Raven's Dilemma

When the Titans reached the tower, Raven was the last one inside. Without a word, she grabbed her small treasure from the bag and headed toward the roof. She had a lot on her mind, and since yesterday's confession, she hadn't had much time to think.

When she got to the roof, she looked over at the shining waves, then off toward the city. For the first time in a long time, she truly noticed the beauty of her world. She sat down, hugging her knees to her chest. For a while, she simply sat there, not doing or thinking anything.

_I know that I'm doing well, so why do I not feel so? Shouldn't I feel happy at my accomplishment?_ Raven felt lost and confused. Why didn't she feel as great as she thought she would be to give her life to the Lord? _Here I am. Can't you give me a sign? A hint? Anything at all?_

Raven's eyes closed, and she tried to put her mind at ease. She put all the verses she could remember into her mind. _The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not be in want…I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me… Those who become Christians become new persons…_

The verses were imprinted in her mind from her readings. She tried to read a little each night, but sometimes came home from a battle too exhausted to even lift the heavy volume. Surely God understood that. Her intentions were good. She fought to save citizens and to prevent evil.

Raven looked down at the bag she still had beside her. Lifting it up, she overturned it onto her hand. The shining cross glittered in the sunlight, and she smiled, but only for a moment. Straightening her back, she removed her cloak to put it around her neck, then she quickly replaced it. Sighing, she lay back to gaze at the clouds.

_If this is the way God wants my life to be, then so be it. If not, there's still the rest of my life to find why I'm here. I have these powers for a reason. Nothing is without purpose. _She sat up. By this time, the sun was beginning to sink down over the large expanse of water. It was simply beautiful; even Raven had to admit that.

Raven heard a noise behind her and stiffened. She didn't want to talk to anyone, but didn't want to shut anyone out anymore, either. She turned to see Beast Boy standing, looking at her. Standing, she turned to face him.

"Yes?" she asked.

"Raven, since when have you been a Christian?" he asked. Personally, Raven was glad he had simply gotten to the point.

"Not very long, but long enough to know what's right and what's wrong, and to know what God expects in my life." She paused, looking at him intently. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, it's because I kind of… don't know whether or not I really believe in God. I want to, but… I can't really explain it. So I was wondering if maybe, if you wanted to, you'd tell me about the Bible a little. Not really what you're doing with Star, just a basic summery of everything in there."

Honestly, Raven was slightly surprised that Beast Boy knew enough words to keep speaking for so long. Brushing away this thought, she smiled slightly.

"Things take time, Beast Boy. It took me a long time to gain a true faith. Starfire believes almost everything, and Robin probably had some kind of spirituality to him before any of this began. Cyborg, well, I may never know about him. But there's a difference in belief and faith. Believing is acceptance; faith leads to action." Beast Boy looked at her, knowing that she was probably right. But how did you explain thousands of years of learning in a 'brief' summery?

For a moment or so, Raven thought. Then, an idea came to her.

"Beast Boy, why don't you try coming to church with me? Any questions you have could go to the pastor. I'm sure he'd be glad to assist you.

Beast Boy considered, then he smiled at her. "Sounds cool. So, do I have to get all dressed up or anything?" he obviously was uncomfortable about the idea.

"No, you just need to look presentable. God doesn't care how you look."

The two teens stood a moment more, and then headed inside. The others were already preparing dinner, and had undoubtedly 'forgotten' to start tofu for Beast Boy.


	5. Free

**Reviewers:**

**Suomynona- I'm glad you think so. Please keep reviewing!**

**titanfan- you've been great support! Thank you for your thoughts.**

**papersak- God could do something as simple as twitch his nose to destroy the Earth, so he could most definitely kick Trigon's butt! **

**The Enduring Man Child- I'm hoping that you'll like my future stories as well, because I plan to be purely a Christian writer as time goes by.**

**God bless, and we may begin!

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Chapter Five: Free

Raven now lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling. She knew that she was loved; she knew that God was on her side, and her new attitude about life made her feel more like one of the team. This, however, did not mean that she was entirely sure of herself. Maybe there was just going to be some part of her that always felt left out. Well, not really forever. She always had eternity to look forward to, but how far away was eternity? Could she really wait that long?

She sighed. _This is going nowhere, _she thought,_ if I need anything, God will provide it; He always has before. _She sat up, and then pulled away her cloak. Draping over a chair, she unfastened her crucifix, which she laid down as well. Tomorrow was another day. She could think then.

Kneeling beside her bed, Raven folded her hands in her lap and lowered her head. _Dear heavenly Father, _she prayed, _help me in my time of need. I don't feel at a right with myself or with you, and I truly want to. Give me the strength to make it through as I pass through the darkness so that I may feel the fullness of Your light. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen. _

Raven settled back against her pillow, then reached for her Bible. She opened to Proverbs and began reading. She had found long ago that reading the verses of Proverbs helped make her feel more at ease with herself. This was the book she most often for reassurance.

A sudden noise roused her from the half-trance, and she shot up, grabbing her cloak as she went. Opening her door soundlessly, she looked out into the hallway. She saw no one there.

"Hello?" she called. Maybe she had imagined the sound? No, that sound had been too real, and it was close. Creeping down the halls, she listened for anything that would provide evidence of someone's presence. She searched the entire hallway, but saw nothing.

"Only my mind… nothing to worry about." But this did not faze her at all. She was not frightened, but she was feeling ill at ease about what the sound could have been. With one final glance over her shoulder, she walked back to her room. Closing her door behind her, she removed her cloak once more. This time, instead of reading from the slightly yellowed pages of her beloved book, she simply removed her shoes and climbed into her bed.

**Raven's Dream:**

_A girl stood in the distance. Her entire body was in shadow, and Raven couldn't see her face. As she walked closer, she heard the sound of weeping. She quickened her pace, and she soon realized that it was the girl who was weeping. Glancing around, Raven saw nothing but darkness._

_As she finally met up with the girl engulfed with shadow, she saw that the girl wore rags. When the girl heard Raven's steps, she lifted her head from her hands and turned. Raven was looking at herself!_

_The ragged Raven bowed her head, not saying a word. Then, a great light filled the room. The light was as bright, if not brighter than the sun. Raven was about to shield her eyes, when suddenly, she saw a man's face appear._

"_You need not be afraid," he said, and then he waved the ragged Raven away. In an instant, she was gone. Then the man turned to her and smiled. She was able to make out only a short few words that made all the difference in the world._

"_Raven, you are free."_

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**You'll find out what the noise was in the next chapter. Keep reviewing, everyone!**


	6. A Surprise For Raven

Chapter Six: A Titan's Confession

The next day was rainy and considerably chilly for mid-summer. The Titans were milling around the Tower doing whatever suited them best. This basically meant that Beast Boy and Cyborg were playing video games, Robin was in the training room, and Raven was reading to Starfire. The morning was, more or less, peaceful.

Raven had awoken that morning feeling wonderful and happy to be alive. She only remembered her dream vaguely, but those few words were still swirling through her mind. _'Raven, you are free.'_

The girls had, by now, gotten to the book of Mark, and were working quite well. Starfire seemed to understand most parts, and always waited until a proper interval to interrupt Raven's reading. They were very constant with their studies, and Raven thought that they covered enough information in one sitting to be a small group, but without the circle of friendly church-goers you'd normally see.

"… They nailed Jesus to a cross and gambled to see who would get his clothes. It was about nine o'clock in the morning when they nailed him to the cross. On it was a sign that told why he was nailed there. It read, 'This is the King of the Jews.' The soldiers also nailed two criminals on crosses, one to the right of Jesus and the other on his left…"

Starfire listened carefully, but did not look up at Raven. It was obvious that her over-emotional friend was fighting off tears, but she wasn't going to mention it to her. She kept on reading, her steady, monotonous voice piercing the overall quiet of the room and everything near it.

"…The chief priests and the teachers of the Law of Moses also made fun of Jesus. They said to each other 'He saved others, but he can't save himself. If he is the Messiah, the king of Israel, let him come down from the cross! Then we will see and believe.'"

"Raven, why did they not believe Jesus? Did they not trust their eyes?" Starfire asked her voice watery.

"They thought he was a false prophet," she answered simply. She was, for some reason, unusually irritable this morning, and would rather be meditating in her room or engulfing herself in her books than sitting in the alien's pink and fuchsia room right now. Although she had been trying to involve herself in her friends' lives, old habits died hard.

"Friend, I believe that you seem…'edgy' and think it may be best if you resettled yourself in another location to feel better. I am grateful that you have helped me, but I am sure that if I have further questions I may ask Robin." Starfire understood people all too easily.

Raven smiled, feeling slightly relieved. "Thanks, Star," was all she said before she closed her Bible and exited to her room.

After she closed the door, she laid her Bible away and sat in her normal position on her bed, chanting. She felt a peace unlike any she'd ever felt before in her life. She was freed of her prison cell she'd once thought was going to hold her for the rest of her life.

A knock on her door aroused her from her thoughts. Opening it, she saw a note taped to the wall across from her door.

'_Go to the common room.'_

"What on earth do they want now?" she asked aloud. She thought a moment. What could they possibly want with her that would not allow for them to simply ask her to go with them in person?

Going along with it, she walked into the main room to find a blue cake, blue and black balloons, and all of her friends grinning at her.

"I thought we agreed after my birthday that there would be no surprise parties," she said, staring at them. "What's this about? Is there something I forgot?"

"Well, we thought that, ya know, we'd throw you a party to show that we're appreciating all you're doing for us." Cyborg grinned, and Raven starred back blankly.

"What do you mean?"

Starfire now stepped forward. "You are teaching me the words of Christ Jesus, you have brought the light and bounty of God into our lives, and you have proven yourself to be a most valuable friend. For this we have given you a party."

"Err… well, thank you," she managed awkwardly; "You do know that this is going against your promise, right?"

"Oh, come on, Raven, just this once can you have fun?" Beast Boy asked her.

Raven had to smile at that. "All right." The Titans cheered.

They had a very nice party, though Raven was still uncomfortable about being the center of attention so much of late. The cake was delicious, they talked and laughed as if they'd not a care in the world, and Raven herself was found to be grinning or laughing outwardly. After the party, though, Beast Boy dragged Raven up to the roof.

"What is it?" She didn't want to sound impatient or annoyed, even though she felt mild cases of both.

"Well, I just wanted to tell you that the party was my idea. I pretty much bribed Robin to let me do this, and I had to sneak in the decorations and ingredients for the cake." He spoke with fully enforced sincerity, and she knew he expected her to be angry by the way he was now staring at the ground. And then it came to her; the noise last night that had spooked her (thought she'd have never admitted it) had only been Beast Boy. Before she realized it, Raven was laughing uncontrollably. Beast Boy didn't know what was so funny, and even more so he didn't know whether to be frightened or relieved, so he simply stood in utter shock.

"Beast Boy," she managed when she finally controlled herself enough to speak, "I had thought I heard something breaking into the Tower last night, and here I find out it was you with party gear!" she said. Beast Boy stood a moment, and then he laughed, too.

They finally quieted, then Raven straightened, looking up at the afternoon sky. Beast Boy looked at her, and he looked down.

"Raven?"

"Yes?" she asked.

"Do you think God would still accept me after I rejected Him?" he asked.

Raven looked at him, startled by his question. "Of course! He's always waiting for you to come to Him. He's got a room for you waiting in His kingdom, and He wants to give you every chance to see it one day."

"So, does that mean I'm still candidate to be a Christian?" He looked at her this time.

"Beast Boy, in God's family, there is always room for one more."

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**Hi everyone!**

**I'm only planning one or two more chapters more, and then I won't be writing very much or very often because I'm trying to write a BOOK to be PUBLISHED and it will take me a while. Wish me luck!**


	7. Author's Note

**Author's Note:**

**If you've already read chapter six and didn't understand the title's correspondence, it's because I had expected the story to come out different and forgot to change it while I was editing. I've changed the title on the main list, but not on the original document. Sorry for confusing you, and thank you, titanfan, for reminding me.**

**God bless!**

**Christiangrrl13**


	8. Bread and Wine

**Here's the deal. This may very well be the end of my story. I'm sorry to those of you who crave more. However, this is not for certain.**

**For anyone who wants to know what my story is going to be about, I've got it posted on my homepage, so check it out!**

**Also, anyone who's given a review up to chapter six, check under reviews; there may be a reply for you there.**

**Finally, in this chapter, the Titans are going to church. I'm Methodist, so if anything does not go as your day goes in church, it is because this is the only church I've ever really attended, and I've been going since I was nine or ten. Virtually speaking, I am young yet in my faith, though I have a stronger faith than some kids I know that have been to church their entire lives.**

**God bless and let's begin!**

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Chapter Seven: Bread and Wine

The Teen Titans were all milling around the Tower on a bright Sunday morning shortly after Raven's 'surprise party'. None of them had yet seen Starfire or Raven, but no one was worried yet; it was only nine-thirty five. Robin was reading a newspaper he had gotten and Cyborg was trying his hardest to keep Beast Boy and his 'tofu garbage' away from the kitchen long enough to make his own breakfast.

Suddenly, the door opened and all three boys looked up and saw both Raven and Starfire wearing dresses. Raven's was deep navy blue and reached her knees with sleeves that touched the wrists, while Starfire's was a light pink color and came half way down her shins. Both girls were wearing nice shoes with short heels. The boys were shocked because, for one thing, they didn't know Raven owned anything with a skirt on it and, secondly, they didn't know why either of the two would be so dressed up in the first place.

"Err… why is Raven in a dress?" Beast Boy asked Cyborg in a half-whisper. Trust him to point out the obvious.

"Because I'm taking Starfire to church with me. She wanted to go, and I decided that going every once in a while would be good for all of us." Her voice held her old hints of annoyance and anger. "Anyone who wants to go with us is allowed to come has to be ready in one hour so we can get there in time to find seats. Today should be, if I'm not mistaken, Communion Sunday, and you will not be there if you're going to take up space while others are trying get to the front." She was obviously agitated at the fact that she was dressed like a girl going to church, so no one spoke back to her, not even Beast Boy.

The girls walked into the kitchen and, carefully as to not ruin their clothes, ate breakfast. Robin left the counter after about ten more minutes of staring at the paper without a word. No one knew what he had gone off for, but no one really cared. Cyborg and Beast Boy had to have a long controversial discussion over whether or not they should join the girls. Finally, they decided that both would go, and Beast Boy had to both be quiet and dress appropriately. He also had to sing. To this Beast Boy agreed because he really didn't think he wanted to stay home alone.

At ten- thirty, everyone was ready to go to church. Both boys that wore clothes (which obviously did not include Cyborg) were in nice clothes, though not quite as nice as you may dress when going to a wedding. Beast Boy looked just as discomforted as any would expect him to be, but no one else complained, not even Raven, despite the fact that she desperately wanted to.

They left in Cyborg's car, which got them all to the building Raven specified safely and all in one piece. No one seemed to know quite how to expect their reception to be since it wasn't every day the Teen Titans waltzed into a church. They all piled out, and then they turned to the greeter, who stood with the door propped open. He was smiling at them, though slightly nervously, as Raven noted. He didn't know what to expect either. _Well, here goes something._

The Titans all managed to pile into one pew, and Raven began flipping through the Directory, which the greeter had handed to her as she passed through the doors. There were announcements on the inside and a schedule of events on the back. The church's symbol was on the front (for those of you who attend church, imagine your church symbol, but since I'm Methodist, I only know my church's symbol).

The Choir stood and began to sing a hymn, but Raven didn't know the song. Once the service began, she'd be able to use the Hymnal, which lay on the back of the pew before her. For now, she simply enjoyed the sound of the high voices of the women corresponding sweetly with the lower tones of the men. When they finished, everyone clapped, even the boys, who did not particularly listen to any such music.

The pastor rose from his seat (once again, I'm speaking from the view of a Methodist, so if your church does not use this term, change it appropriately to 'Reverend' or whatever it is you say). He began to give the greeting, and then moved to announcements. He pointed out a church youth group procession taking place soon, then went on to tell about a picnic in June. He spoke loudly and clearly, and even the Titans, sitting in the far back, heard every word.

Finally, they stood to sing. _May as well get it over with now, Raven,_ she thought to herself as she rose_, they're going to hear you sing and you're going to have to live with it. _

Everyone looked surprised to see her sing. She, Raven, who was so reclusive and walled herself within her room for hours or even days on end, was singing. More than that, she was singing well, with an angelic tone to her voice and matching each pitch with the Choir. For a moment, they merely stood there, mouths agape. Finally, though, they each woke themselves enough to sing along.

The singing done with, Cyborg, who was sitting next to Raven, turned to comment on her singing. The moment he opened his mouth, however, she pressed her finger to her lips and pointed toward the pastor, who was beginning prayer. Nodding his acknowledgement, he, too, bowed his head and folded his hands. It took Beast Boy a moment longer to catch on, but followed suit when the pastor began to pray.

During the entire sermon, Beast Boy could be seen fidgeting or twiddling his thumbs. He was not very good at staying still for very long, and so he tried to contain the anxiety it provided him with. He did make it through the sermon in one piece.

At last, it was time for the Communion, and the rows of people began rising and walking forward, looking to receiving theirs. _"You don't need to be a perfect Christian, you just need to love Jesus to take the Communion," _he had said. Raven knew that she was going, but, despite her threats, would her friends stay here? She knew that Starfire would not, and most likely not Robin, but what of Cyborg and Beast Boy? She dared not question.

She was relieved, however, to find that when Robin (who sat on the end) got up to let the others through, Starfire rose, and after Raven had gone through to the isle, she saw the other two stand and follow. But were they only doing this for fear of what Raven would do to them otherwise? She hoped not. Why did she have to be so scornful?

When she got to the front, she stood before everyone and got down to kneel at the alter (that's the term, once again, at my beloved church). She waited patiently for the bread and cup to come around, and saw her friends come kneel beside her to do the same. When the cup and bread came, she heard the words said softly to her "_Body of Christ, broken for you,"_ then_ "Blood of Christ, shed for you." _She took them both, then took a moment longer to pray. She prayed about everything, from her friends, to the villains she fought regularly, to the people she had to protect whom she didn't even know.

And when it was all over, she felt a weight taken from her shoulders. She, Raven truly felt free.


	9. Home At Last

**Hey guys! This is the final chapter, because I'm working on my book now. For anyone curious, the title is Another Kind of Mage. If it gets published, look under 'Leigh Hulsey' as the author. It's probably going to be part one of a trilogy...**

**Anyway, this chapter takes place decades later on... read and please, please tell me your real thoughts; I can't be a good author unless I get your criticism!**

**God bless, and now we'll begin!**

* * *

Chapter Eight: Home At Last

_Raven stood in a brightly lit expanse of endless space, alone. She could see no one, but heard laughter and rejoicing coming from every direction. She did not move, for she did not know where she was or even how she had gotten here. _

_She looked down at herself. Gasping in amazement, she realized that this was not the same body she had gotten so accustomed to. This body was pure and beautiful and clothed in white, and though she'd never before seen it, she knew it was hers. She knew because it felt more right than anything else she'd ever known._

_Suddenly, she started, realizing that she was no longer alone. Looking up, she gaped, seeing the most beautiful sight she'd ever beheld. Before her, a beautiful figure stood, shining brighter than the sun ever could have, yet these eyes could easily behold him. He stood, smiling down at her, and spoke in a gentle and patient voice that soothed her very soul. _

"_Hello, Daughter."_

_And at last, Raven knew where she was, and more so than that, she realized that there was no other place she'd rather be. _

"_I am here, O Father." Her voice was steady, though her knees shook so harshly she feared that she would collapse._

"_Daughter, I have but two questions to ask you," he said to her, peaceful and without malice._

"_I've nothing to hide." Raven could only hope that this was true._

"_What did you do with my Son, Jesus Christ?"_

_Raven gulped. She'd known that this was coming. "For years of my life, I lived in ignorance to him, but when finally I accepted him into my heart, I shared him with the world." She spoke only truth, and knew that no other answer would have been good enough now._

"_What did you do with the gifts that I gave to you?" he asked, his eyes shining with both pride and adoration. Raven had never seen anyone look at her like that in her entire life, but suddenly knew that that was the only look she'd ever see on his face for all of eternity._

"_I provided love to the loveless, I fought for the innocent, and I used my powers for the good of all man-kind. Whenever I could, I lived to return your love and give it to those in need at the same time." Tears were streaming from her eyes, but she was not sad. To the contrary, she was so happy, she wanted to dance, to sing. Instead, she stood still, crying and rejoicing, for she knew what was going to come next._

_A gate appeared now, shining golden. The figure with whom she stood now approached her, holding his hand to her. She took it, holding it with everything she had. She was overjoyed to the point of bursting. She didn't know what to say or do, so she did nothing but follow._

_The gate opened on its own, swinging effortlessly away from them. They stepped into a vast expanse of grass that was greener than any she'd seen in her life. There were houses everywhere, and all she could see anywhere could be described with one word; paradise. No other word she knew was good enough, and neither was the one she chose, for that matter._

"_Well done my good and faithful servant," he was saying, "Raven, welcome home."_

**The End of The Beginning**


	10. Author's Note

Author's Note:

Hello! Just letting you know; the last chapter takes place at the end of Raven's life, as in decades from now. For those of you confused about this, I'm sorry. I'm now in the midst of my first ever book, so I won't be spending must time on the computer for a while. Wish me luck!

Your fellow disciple and friend,

Christiangrrl13


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